


dirty

by sunglassesface



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Character Study (?), Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Stanley Uris Takes a Bath, i love stan and am sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2021-01-22 16:53:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21305387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunglassesface/pseuds/sunglassesface
Summary: he promised. he swore. they stained their names on the town with their blood.
Kudos: 12





	dirty

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in about five minutes on a whim of inspiration hence its brevity and probable nonsensical-ness
> 
> stan stans wya

derry. 

memories run through his mind faster than he can comprehend them. blood. screaming. a clown, a painting. fear. fear. fear. he feels like he’ll throw up. he does. 

i won't come back, he thinks. i can't come back.  
and yet

yet something in him almost can't turn away. 

he promised. he swore. they stained their names on the town with their blood. despite the freezing cold dread seeping through his body at the mere thought of the town, despite everything his mind is screaming, he’s afraid that he just might go back.  
he promised.

there was a dam. there was a clubhouse, and smoke, and a boy named richie. eddie and bill, and then ben, and beverly, and mike. there was love that summer, he knew, more love and belonging than he thinks he might have ever felt since. but there was terror, too. horror and dirt. a grime that made itself at home inside him and perhaps never left. 

no, he thinks. (i swear) no amount of love could ever make returning to that dirtiness worth it. (i swear, bill)

he decides to take a bath. to clean himself as much as he can, though he knows he might never been clean enough again. 

he’ll have to scrub. and wipe. and claw. and scratch. maybe even bleed. 

he’ll bleed the grime out.


End file.
